Is this not rude
A woman sat in the seat behind me on my commuter train opened window. What about others in the carriage? What if we don’t want the window open? In other circumstances doing something similar would count as being rude. I am now colder than I want to be. Her choice has dictated what others feel like. There is little I can do. Shutting the window again would be as rude. So I live with it. What are other shipmates’ experiences?
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That is the problem. There is no agreement either way. Neither side ask they both just assume it is ok. It is not too bad at the moment but in winter people open the windows and you can visibly see other shiver because it is so cold.
I tend to chat to tourists and other travellers when I can. Whether I am an oddball is for others to decide.
The apparent rudeness in the OP depends on the circumstances. I've often seen people ask their fellow passengers whether it's OK for them to open the window.
I'll get me coat ...
Yeah, and I've experienced the case where there were both openable windows and A/C - which tends to lead to a kind of tug of war effect in the heat
Unless I remember to be polite. Which I might not.
I find it surprising you can manage to be too cold on a train, in a heatwave, that is apparently too full for you to change seat and get out of the draft.
Why's that? We are talking about the top part not the entire glass panel.
Some more modern train carriages here don't have windows that open, as far as I am aware. It's not something that's ever bothered me one way or another and although I no longer commute by train I do use them fairly regularly.
I'm more bothered by over-crowded trains, delayed trains or blocked loos.
I'm old enough to remember the old fashioned carriages with compartments. They were more sociable and you could open the windows.
C S Lewis had a story of his father travelling in one in Northern Ireland. A fellow passenger, was unable to get to the toilet (for whatever reason, possibly lack of a corridor and an expectation that you 'went' into the carriage with the toilets when the train stopped at a station?). The fella dropped his trousers and did a dump on the carriage floor.
Lewis's father opened the windows and lit a pipe to disguise the smell whereupon the grumpy passenger pointed to the 'No Smoking' sign on the carriage window.
Lewis's father felt it was emblematic of double-standards in Ulster Protestant religiosity.
At least we don't have to put up with that sort of thing on Britain's modern and efficient rail network ....
Why is it any more offensive than my being told to 'fuck off'?
If people tell me to 'fuck off' then that's fair enough but a mild riposte, whether 'ill-timed' or otherwise in Hell doesn't strike me as an over-reaction.
Ruth says herself that she is direct and speaks her mind. Which is fine. I respect that.
I tease people at times. I've lived in Yorkshire where teasing people is a sign of acceptance. I know it doesn't always come over well online and I sometimes get told off for it. Which is fine. People can always tell me to 'fuck off' if they don't like it.
I won't tell you to do that but I will ask you to butt-out you po-faced prig.
I didn't intend to tell you so, but here we are.
On a very practical level, if you want to be sure that people understand you're teasing, PUT THE SMILEY FACE FIRST, or the note "just a joke" or what-have-you. Then we at least understand what you're trying to do. Waiting till people haul you over the coals first is too late. Then you feel bad, and we feel bad, and ...
Ah, the whole thing kinda sucks.
I sometimes use phrases like 'joking aside' but I can't always tell whether people know whether I'm teasing or not. I banter a lot in real life and tend to do so in a straight-faced, dead-pan kind of way until people clock what I'm doing through a wry smile or I say something so absurdly hyperbolic that they realise what I'm doing.
I apologise to @Dafyd and to anyone else I may have offended here recently.
😀 now you can all butt-out you po-faced prigs ...
(In fact, I never got started, for just this reason. I don't think anybody would know if I tried.)
Ok. We do have a lot of old rolling stock here. Air-conditioning isn't as much of a thing here either. Likely to be more so in future the way things are going.