I went to a prestigious grammar school in the 1960's, 'Minor sexual abuse' (touching, feeling) of pupils by some teachers was taken for granted and unremarkable. Point is - the perpetrators were in other ways good people and excellent teachers.
Their abuse never got out of hand ... it was just accepted in those days.
The past is a foreign country ......
Not that far in the past. The History Boys, about an inspiring teacher "undeservedly" forced out over entirely true allegations of sexual abuse, was first performed to stellar reviews only just over twenty years ago.
I think I remember that controversy. The play was accused of legitimizing pedophilia, under the guise of "Oh, it's just what happens in those schools, heck, one of the boys went on a trip to Greece with his so-called abuser, and he had a great time."
Didn't see the play myself, I think I'm going by Johann Hari's criticism in a column attacking what he viewed as attempts to normalize adult-minor sex.
OK, I’m curious to know what would have been regarded as “out of hand”
I see my attempt at humour even in this dark area of Human behaviour went clunk. My bad.
That kinda sarcasm requires an exaggerated tone, so that it's clearly something an actual apologist would not say.
Nope. Never got out of hand. Just good old fashioned sadism and rape. The English Way, y'know, up there with Yorkshire pudding and darts at the pub on a Sunday afternoon.
Anyone remember that comedy film from the 1980s called "Rita, Sue and Bob Too"?
I remember people at the time talking about how good it was and I think it might even have been shown on the TV.
I can't claim to have been sickened enough not to watch it but I do remember it caused me sleepless nights for a long time as I couldn't help worrying about teachers and young members of my family.
I'm not sure why I thought of that. I suppose it reflects changes in cultural acceptance of things, I don't think many would today make a comedy film about that.
OK, I’m curious to know what would have been regarded as “out of hand”
I see my attempt at humour even in this dark area of Human behaviour went clunk. My bad.
I did get the humour. I think the problem is that this is not ancient past. It is that we are only just seeing what was happening.
So the picture is still emerging of what the establishment was prepared to accept. And it is a lot more than an occasional tap on the butt. Which in itself is not acceptable.
'Anyone remember that comedy film from the 1980s called "Rita, Sue and Bob Too"?'
I looked up the film on the Internet. Eek and ugh double eek. I'm glad I didn't see it when it was released. I wonder if I'd have thought of it at the time. [confession time, Lord have mercy] probably something like, 'A well made lightheated fun film'. ... I have perhaps grown up just a bit in the last forty odd years.
Many years ago when I was going for a church admin job, I put being a Purgatory host on the Ship in a section of my resume covering volunteer work. I don't know what they thought of that, but I did get the job.
Comments
And humor, or attempts in that direction, I guess.
I think I remember that controversy. The play was accused of legitimizing pedophilia, under the guise of "Oh, it's just what happens in those schools, heck, one of the boys went on a trip to Greece with his so-called abuser, and he had a great time."
Didn't see the play myself, I think I'm going by Johann Hari's criticism in a column attacking what he viewed as attempts to normalize adult-minor sex.
That kinda sarcasm requires an exaggerated tone, so that it's clearly something an actual apologist would not say.
Nope. Never got out of hand. Just good old fashioned sadism and rape. The English Way, y'know, up there with Yorkshire pudding and darts at the pub on a Sunday afternoon.
I remember people at the time talking about how good it was and I think it might even have been shown on the TV.
I can't claim to have been sickened enough not to watch it but I do remember it caused me sleepless nights for a long time as I couldn't help worrying about teachers and young members of my family.
Presumably trying to coast on the My Beautiful Laundrette thing. But when a film has to explain its politics to you on the poster...
I did get the humour. I think the problem is that this is not ancient past. It is that we are only just seeing what was happening.
So the picture is still emerging of what the establishment was prepared to accept. And it is a lot more than an occasional tap on the butt. Which in itself is not acceptable.
I looked up the film on the Internet. Eek and ugh double eek. I'm glad I didn't see it when it was released. I wonder if I'd have thought of it at the time. [confession time, Lord have mercy] probably something like, 'A well made lightheated fun film'. ... I have perhaps grown up just a bit in the last forty odd years.
there is no such thing
there is unawareness of the damage it has done to you.
there is a misguided belief that there are degrees of abuse.
when abuse occurs the physiological, sexual and emotional damage is swift and absolute. well documented and understood.
The Body Keeps The Score by Bessel Van Der Kolk is a good place to start, if you want to understand the science.
--- chrisstiles, Hell Host
Many years ago when I was going for a church admin job, I put being a Purgatory host on the Ship in a section of my resume covering volunteer work. I don't know what they thought of that, but I did get the job.