Headlines of Utter Weirdness

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Comments

  • Hedgehog wrote: »
    Here is a link to the hidden blob of water article, but @Roseofsharon has summed it up quite well.

    Thank you, both!
  • Pub receives damning food hygiene rating after chef leaves in disgrace - this appears to be the usual kind of grammatical error, but is in fact correct!
  • PigletPiglet All Saints Host, Circus Host
    Let me get this straight - the chef left in disgrace before they got the duff hygiene rating?

    Perhaps they should have kept him on ...
  • It seems as though the chef was dismissed because of his behaviour, and not for bad cooking/hygiene.

    So yes, just for once, the headline and the story make sense...
  • Wesley JWesley J Circus Host
    edited January 16
    Could have had something like this: Pub quizzed about hygiene :smile:
  • Pubs can't talk (although they often have quizzes).
  • PigletPiglet All Saints Host, Circus Host
    Wesley J wrote: »
    Could have had something like this: Pub quizzed about hygiene :smile:

    Ho ho ho. :mrgreen:
  • Drinkers outrage as pub quizzing hygiene chaos worsens
  • Wesley JWesley J Circus Host
    edited January 17
    Excellent! :D

    Actually, apply alliteration? Drinkers despondent as pub quizzing hygiene chaos worsens
  • Bishops FingerBishops Finger Shipmate
    edited January 17
    Wesley J wrote: »
    Excellent! :D

    Actually, apply alliteration? Drinkers despondent as pub quizzing hygiene chaos worsens

    How about Drinkers despondent as pub quizzing hygiene devastation deepens ?

    Alliteration's artful aid aptly applied...
  • Drinkers despair as hostelry hygiene crisis deepens...
  • BBC website: Laura Kuenssberg grilling Culture Secretary Lisa Nandy on Greenland.

    Do you think she's using a charcoal barbecue?
  • A truly great headline from "Wales Online": We bought a home and found 83 bodies buried under it. To explain: the "home" was a disused church.
  • Wesley JWesley J Circus Host
    BBC website: Laura Kuenssberg grilling Culture Secretary Lisa Nandy on Greenland.

    Do you think she's using a charcoal barbecue?
    BBC descends into cannibalism!

    And: Greenland could be some sort of George Foreman-type frying apparatus!

    (Hm... I'm getting hungry now, lunchtime approacheth... :p )
  • Wesley J wrote: »
    BBC website: Laura Kuenssberg grilling Culture Secretary Lisa Nandy on Greenland.

    Do you think she's using a charcoal barbecue?
    BBC descends into cannibalism!

    And: Greenland could be some sort of George Foreman-type frying apparatus!

    (Hm... I'm getting hungry now, lunchtime approacheth... :p )

    Longpig?
  • Wesley JWesley J Circus Host
    edited January 19
    No thanks, but I appreciate your offer. Regular porkie sausages this time.
  • AravisAravis Shipmate
    Not actually a headline, but driving home through town this evening I saw a sign advertising “Chilled Bears”.
  • HedgehogHedgehog Shipmate
    It has been rather cold recently....
  • EnochEnoch Shipmate
    edited January 22
    This, I think from Premier Christianity recently - and if not, from another faith periodical which should equally be aware why it is a bizarre headline.
    "People are betting on the second coming of Christ happening in 2026. Should Christians take it seriously?"
    including, just in case one might have thought this was merely rhetoric, a statement further down,
    "Reports are now emerging of some placing financial bets on Christ coming back in 2026."
    It demonstrates a weird piece of both theological and financial illiteracy to imagine that when the Day of the Lord happens, one will be able to go round to the bookmaker's the next morning to collect one's winnings.

    [ETA: Inserted blank line for better reading - Wesley J, Circus Host]
  • From today's BBC Sports News page: 'Tears in my eyes' - Jesus enjoys 'dream night' in San Siro'
  • Enoch wrote: »
    This, I think from Premier Christianity recently - and if not, from another faith periodical which should equally be aware why it is a bizarre headline.
    "People are betting on the second coming of Christ happening in 2026. Should Christians take it seriously?"
    including, just in case one might have thought this was merely rhetoric, a statement further down,
    "Reports are now emerging of some placing financial bets on Christ coming back in 2026."
    It demonstrates a weird piece of both theological and financial illiteracy to imagine that when the Day of the Lord happens, one will be able to go round to the bookmaker's the next morning to collect one's winnings.

    You couldn't make it up.
    :scream:

    Mind you, if you were to bet on the Rapture occurring in 2026, you might be able to collect your winnings, just in time for the Tribulation or whatever...
    RockyRoger wrote: »
    From today's BBC Sports News page: 'Tears in my eyes' - Jesus enjoys 'dream night' in San Siro'

    It's good to know that Our Blessed Lord is having a good time. Shame about the rest of us, but hey...

  • SipechSipech Shipmate
    Trump tells Davos that Europe is heading in wrong direction - MSN
    So now he's taking issue with plate tectonics, is he?
  • Wesley JWesley J Circus Host
    edited January 22
    Trump talking to a Swiss alpine village of 10k inhabitants? - They've surely got better things to do than assisting Europe. Like, trying to avoid avalanches and rockslides?
  • Outrage and heartbreak as innocent Swiss villagers traumatised by US felon's misuse of English...
  • Wesley JWesley J Circus Host
    :D
  • Carnage and chaos as blubbering Swiss villagers flee convicted US felon's onslaught...
  • Wesley JWesley J Circus Host
    They don't. He's gone. - Back to shovelling snow it is.
  • Bishops FingerBishops Finger Shipmate
    edited January 24
    Joy as stricken Swiss village returns to normality...
  • For some reason, or possibly none at all, this conversation reminds me of a headline from a few years ago: Austrian village of 'Fucking' decides to change its name https://www.dw.com/en/austrian-village-of-fucking-decides-to-change-its-name/a-55740967
  • HedgehogHedgehog Shipmate
    Did they change it to "Just Good Friends"?
  • Hedgehog wrote: »
    Did they change it to "Just Good Friends"?

    Genius, @Hedgehog !
  • PigletPiglet All Saints Host, Circus Host
    What he said ^^^

    I suppose they could have been twinned with Hell in Norway ... :mrgreen:
  • Piglet wrote: »
    What he said ^^^

    I suppose they could have been twinned with Hell in Norway ... :mrgreen:

    🤣🤣🤣
  • Piglet wrote: »
    What he said ^^^

    I suppose they could have been twinned with Hell in Norway ... :mrgreen:

    Fulking in Sussex has a hill known locally as Fulking hill... I'd live there!
  • Not a headline, but something I've just read in an Anglican church's Annual Report. I understand what it's saying - but the immediate meaning to a Baptist such as myself is bizarre!
    A handmade bespoke bookcase for the use of children has been installed in the Baptistry.
  • But...but...the lovely Books will surely get wet...
    :fearful:

    O wait - is it the Children living in the bookcase who will get wet? That might not be so bad a thing :naughty: as long as the Right Words are used.
  • And they come up for air as necessary.
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