Prayers for people who do terrible things

One thing I keep running into online (and not especially on the Ship--I mean social media) is the desire for people who do terrible things, who have died, to go to Hell, rather than ultimately be redeemed (however long that redemption might take). This disturbs me greatly. As a Christian, while I am not a Universalist, I believe in praying not just for people I revere, love, or even like, but for those who have done terrible evil, whether political figures, religious figures, murderers, terrorists, or many others. Surely Jesus died for all of us, every single one of us? (Not only the recent murder of Charlie Kirk, but the recent horrific terror attack on the synagogue, has brought this to mind.)

Thoughts?

Comments

  • I agree, I always pray for the souls of those who do terrible things. I pray for the pain and hurt that has caused them to do these things to be removed, and that they come to understand God's healing love for them. I do this whether they are still alive or have passed away.
  • NicoleMRNicoleMR Shipmate
    In my 12-step program (Al-anon, for friends and family of alcoholics) we are encouraged to pray for those against whom we have resentments. I have shared here before about my cousins who were murdered in 1999 by their husband/father. I of course had a great deal of hatred, and anger, against the murderer. But after being reminded of this by pages in my daily reader, I tried to pray for him. Getting those words out was one of the hardest things I've ever had to do, but it did help drain some of the pain.
  • Wise words in this thread.
  • I found it troubling to see headlines saying that only two people had died in the synagogue attack in Manchester. The murderer was still a person, regardless of what drove him to kill.
  • ChastMastr wrote: »
    One thing I keep running into online (and not especially on the Ship--I mean social media) is the desire for people who do terrible things, who have died, to go to Hell, rather than ultimately be redeemed (however long that redemption might take). This disturbs me greatly. As a Christian, while I am not a Universalist, I believe in praying not just for people I revere, love, or even like, but for those who have done terrible evil, whether political figures, religious figures, murderers, terrorists, or many others. Surely Jesus died for all of us, every single one of us? (Not only the recent murder of Charlie Kirk, but the recent horrific terror attack on the synagogue, has brought this to mind.)

    Thoughts?

    Well said, only this morning the Holy Spirit convicted me for not praying for my (soon to be ex) son-in law who has treated my daughter badly. Why haven't I?
    I, who is a spiritual mentor to others, who has long forgiven those who harmed me in the past, and who has even forgiven himself (mostly) 'should' (?) have known better.
    Lord have mercy.
  • I found it troubling to see headlines saying that only two people had died in the synagogue attack in Manchester. The murderer was still a person, regardless of what drove him to kill.

    Yeah, I assumed he’d been arrested or something at first. It was odd.
  • RockyRoger wrote: »
    ChastMastr wrote: »
    One thing I keep running into online (and not especially on the Ship--I mean social media) is the desire for people who do terrible things, who have died, to go to Hell, rather than ultimately be redeemed (however long that redemption might take). This disturbs me greatly. As a Christian, while I am not a Universalist, I believe in praying not just for people I revere, love, or even like, but for those who have done terrible evil, whether political figures, religious figures, murderers, terrorists, or many others. Surely Jesus died for all of us, every single one of us? (Not only the recent murder of Charlie Kirk, but the recent horrific terror attack on the synagogue, has brought this to mind.)

    Thoughts?

    Well said, only this morning the Holy Spirit convicted me for not praying for my (soon to be ex) son-in law who has treated my daughter badly. Why haven't I?
    I, who is a spiritual mentor to others, who has long forgiven those who harmed me in the past, and who has even forgiven himself (mostly) 'should' (?) have known better.
    Lord have mercy.

    🕯🫂
  • DoublethinkDoublethink Admin, 8th Day Host
    edited October 4
    ChastMastr wrote: »
    I found it troubling to see headlines saying that only two people had died in the synagogue attack in Manchester. The murderer was still a person, regardless of what drove him to kill.

    Yeah, I assumed he’d been arrested or something at first. It was odd.

    He was shot and in the process the police killed at least one congregant and injured at least one other. The attacker rammed the crowd with a car, then left the vehicle, attacking with a knife, and subsequently trying to break through the doors of the synagogue by body charging them and throwing heavy objects, whilst people inside held the doors closed. It was one of the people holding the doors who was fatally injured by police gunfire when they shot at the attacker.

    Tbf to the police, they probably shot rather than using tasers because they thought he was carrying a bomb. He is reported to have been wearing a padded belt. I think it turned out not to be a bomb, but they couldn't possibly have known that at the time.

    He was on bail for rape - which fits the pattern of spree killers having a history of intimate violence and resorting to murderous suicide by cop with a convenient "cause" when their life is falling apart - presumably to try and make themselves look like heroes to others who share their "cause" and distract from scumbaggery that can't be convincingly repackaged as martyrdom.

    I agree we should pray for all involved, but it can be very difficult to do so with sincerity.
  • I agree we should pray for all involved, but it can be very difficult to do so with sincerity.
    Indeed, and I think the situation mentioned in the OP as the starting point for this discussion (“the desire for people who do terrible things, who have died, to go to Hell”) is a very real, very human emotion. Acknowledgment of that reality is frankly the only way I can make sense of the last verses of Psalm 137.

    But acknowledgement of that very real, very human emotion is not the same as feeding or nurturing it. For most of us, the question isn’t whether we feel that emotion, but what we do in response. I suspect that unless we face head-on that part of us that wants them to suffer immensely in return for the immense suffering they’ve caused us or others, it’s all but impossible to pray for their well-being and their forgiveness. And I’m reluctant to judge those who simply aren’t at the place yet where they can pray for that with sincerity.


  • BoogieBoogie Heaven Host
    I truly don't want anyone to suffer immensely, or at all, whatever they have done.

    This causes me to have no understanding whatever of those who cause suffering.

    I can't accidentally stand on a snail without feeling remorse.

    Praying? I pray that they will know love and show love/charity to others.
  • This is why I find the concept of balancing energies through successive incarnations so a) comforting and b) congruent with the Grace of God.

    I don't subscribe to the PSA view of Christ because I have met Him and so I know He is not dead but very very much alive and present in this reality in ways that are both surprising and wholly mundane.

    I prefer to view us working through the successive stages of experience on our way to a final and wholly satisfactory conclusion wherein we are all wholly forgiving and forgiven.

    This is why forgiveness is the greatest gift you can give to your aggressor because you decouple yourself from the obligation to incarnate in order to replay the drama and receive their contrition. Forgiving sets the balance at zero and liberates yourself and the other from seeking a "satisfactory outcome".

    The Grace of God desn't fall out of the sky. If God needs to show Grace it is through us. We are His agents. So we should act as if we understand our responsibility in this regard.

    AFF
  • PomonaPomona Shipmate
    I think it's normal and reasonable for people to not want someone who does terrible things to be able to enjoy Heaven. There is also a sense of wanting people to be held accountable for their crimes, which I think is pretty reasonable, especially in cases like with the synagogue attack where there won't be a trial. I'm not saying that such responses are good or bad as such, but I think they are normal. Also, many people who say such things are not Christians or religious in general so it seems unreasonable to hold them to Christian standards.

  • I agree we should pray for all involved, but it can be very difficult to do so with sincerity.

    It's why, when I pray for such people, i grit my teeth and say something like "Lord, you know i really don't want to be praying for that person, but you told me to, so please ...". No need to manufacture or change feelings, just tell him what he knows is there already.

  • I agree we should pray for all involved, but it can be very difficult to do so with sincerity.

    How would one gauge “sincerity” here? And what does that mean?

  • I agree we should pray for all involved, but it can be very difficult to do so with sincerity.

    It's why, when I pray for such people, i grit my teeth and say something like "Lord, you know i really don't want to be praying for that person, but you told me to, so please ...". No need to manufacture or change feelings, just tell him what he knows is there already.

    Amen. I’m not thinking about whether my emotions like it or not—they may be helpful or they may be obstacles, but the command to pray even for our own enemies remains regardless.
  • ChastMastr wrote: »
    I agree we should pray for all involved, but it can be very difficult to do so with sincerity.
    How would one gauge “sincerity” here? And what does that mean?
    ChastMastr wrote: »

    I agree we should pray for all involved, but it can be very difficult to do so with sincerity.

    It's why, when I pray for such people, i grit my teeth and say something like "Lord, you know i really don't want to be praying for that person, but you told me to, so please ...". No need to manufacture or change feelings, just tell him what he knows is there already.
    Amen. I’m not thinking about whether my emotions like it or not—they may be helpful or they may be obstacles, but the command to pray even for our own enemies remains regardless.
    It seems to me these two thoughts are connected. Are we really praying for our enemies if we do so only because we’re commanded to but don’t really mean it? Or are we doing a version of “Lord, I’m saying what you want me to say, but I’ll really be okay with it if you answer ‘no’”? It seems to me that a command that we pray for our enemies is as much about an invitation to be open to change in ourselves as it is about praying for others.

    Ezekiel 36:26–27 comes to mind:
    A new heart I will give you, and a new spirit I will put within you, and I will remove from your body the heart of stone and give you a heart of flesh. I will put my spirit within you and make you follow my statutes and be careful to observe my ordinances.

    I’m thinking that the “new heart” we are called to receive is a heart that truly loves our enemies, and one in which our emotions and feelings are consistent with prayers that we offer not because we’re commanded to make those prayers, but because we are people in whom such prayers are as natural as breathing.

    Granted, it can be really hard, and sometimes we have to fake it ‘til we make it. But we shouldn’t, I don’t think, be content with faking it.


  • @Nick Tamen said
    Are we really praying for our enemies if we do so only because we’re commanded to but don’t really mean it?

    I don’t consider my emotions and feelings at the time to be a correct gauge of whether or not I “mean” something. Again, my emotions can help drive my will in the right direction, or they can be an obstacle to overcome, like the wind when piloting a boat.

    Whether partly here on Earth or not, I trust that my emotions, like the rest of me, will be healed and made what they’re supposed to be in Heaven and in the New Creation in ultimate redemption. The action of praying for one’s enemies can be part of that transformation process, certainly.
  • Yes indeed. The problem (if it IS a problem, i think it's a blessing) with praying anything insincerely is that God has every right to take my grudging prayer as if i meant every word of it, and he so often does. And i know that he's like that. So if i pray for my enemies without the least good intention but bare obedience, he not only blesses them, but the effect of that blessing spreads backward into the life of the one asking the blessing, that is, me. Because it's very hard to go on hating someone wholeheartedly when you are (however grudgingly) doing them good. I mean, try it sometime. Find a minor enemy (neighbor who hates you, coworker who stresses you) and start secretly doing them good (rake their leaves, praise their work to the boss, whatever). Do that regularly and see if your hatred doesn't slowly start morphing into tolerance. Go too long and you might end up loving them...
  • carexcarex Shipmate
    I recently read a wonderful statement from a young woman that was being submitted to a court hearing to sentence her father for sexually abusing her starting at age 10 (facing up to 15 years in prison). She actually wished him well, and hoped he would get the support he needed to recover and move on with his life. But she also made it clear that she wanted nothing to do with him for the rest of her life, because the memories were too painful. And that the real punishment for him would be missing out on all the milestones and other joyous moments of her life.
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