...even for parts. Dad had a bit of camera and radio gear and I think it's better people who like these things and know what to do with them will find them and put them to good use...
I think that's entirely the right thing to do - a lot of my tools etc have come that way, and in time I expect they'll go the same way!
Absolutely. When my dad died, a friend of his (along with a friend of his) who were into machinery, tools and whatnot came and cleared out his workshop, taking whatever they could use - win-win.
My brothers' friends sorted dad's tools, except I took the folding 2 foot ruler because I played with it as a child and it's the only thing I have that was Dad's.
You have both reminded me of something the old men say at the museum I do some volunteering at, asking after one of their number who has been off for a while: 'So-and-so is doing OK, but you wouldn't lend him a spanner' In other words, the executors might not get it back to you! Sometimes the spanner is replaced by a tenner, and the idea is just the same.
Our (industrial) museum is drowning in dead-men's-tools. I like tools, so for me this is a good thing!
@Huia , that's a nice thing to remember your Dad by. A steel one, or one of those boxwood things with brass hinges which folds 3 ways?
Me too!
When Mr Puzzler is home from hospital and sufficiently strong enough I will be begging him to agree to get rid of some of his stuff. He can’t take it with him. Am hoping he can make a hobby of selling the specialist collectibles rather than leaving me with the task, when I know nothing about them.
Me too!
When Mr Puzzler is home from hospital and sufficiently strong enough I will be begging him to agree to get rid of some of his stuff. He can’t take it with him. Am hoping he can make a hobby of selling the specialist collectibles ….
Good idea!
I have started on the three boxes of paper nostalgia today. I’m hoping to whittle it down to one box. It’s do-able but I know it will take a long time.
As part of a larger sock-declutter I have just binned a pair of red nylon socks which I bought in Esslemont & McIntosh's closing down sale. They were ridiculously cheap, as I recall. I then rarely wore them because why wear nylon socks when you have cotton socks?
Google tells me that E&M closed in 2007.
Perhaps I should have kept them as a reminder that a bargain is only a bargain if you are actually going to use the item.
I have fourteen of my late grandfather's pocket diaries spanning 1976-1989. My grandfather was not a Samuel Pepys; I have only dipped into his diaries, but everything is mundane - a late frost, a slow puncture, a haircut, a family birthday, a visit from a friend.
The main pleasure is in seeing his distinctive writing. I know no-one in the generation below me will be interested in them. Rather than have them just sitting there on a shelf, is there anything I could do with them?
Talk to a living history project or call a history department for ideas. Not much longer and there WILL be significant interest in even ordinary accounts of ordinary experiences. Those most of all, sometimes. Worst comes to worst, arrange to set them aside for 30 years and have someone revisit the question then. A box with a grandchild name on it?
I'd have to read them all to be sure, but I really don't think there's anything of historical interest in them - and history is my subject, so I've got a fair idea of what might be interesting.
On 3 March 1976, my grandfather dropped my grandmother off at her sisters, and went for a walk. On 3 March 1977, my grandparents had tea and sandwiches with my aunt, on 3 March 1978, it rained all day, so my grandfather stayed in, wrote a letter to his sister in Canada and watched TV, on 3 March 1979 my grandfather bought vegetables, watched Scotland play rugby on TV and had a phone call from his friend Alec, on 3 March 1980 there was an overnight frost, he checked the oil level in the car, and called in on a friend.
Also, if I were to pass them on to a project, I'd have to add notes as to who the people mentioned were, as they would mean even less to anyone who didn't know that Liz was my grandfather's sister, Charlie was his next door neighbour etc etc.
The plan is that I catalogue everything, then we send the list to the C of S to see what they think should be archived with National Registers of Scotland. I'm not sure what the plan is for the stuff the NRS don't want, though.
I have a decorator booked for 8 May to do the bedroom and a downstairs room, an extension which is also the only way through to the back garden and tends to accumulate Stuff.
I have decided the only way to cope is to put Furniture and Stuff into storage. MrPuzzler thinks this is crazy, but needs must. There is a fair bit of decluttering to be done first.
I also plan to get new carpets for those rooms, hoping the carpet layer can fit in with my precise dates.
... I'm not sure what the plan is for the stuff the NRS don't want, though.
Would any of it be of interest to your local library/archives, if it involves information about local church people and events?
They'd almost certainly say NO, NO, a thousand times NO to any attempt to send them any private and personal papers, but church records would have great use in any historical study of your area.
Apologies - I was thinking more along the lines of old photographs and/or reports of things like the annual Harvest Supper, carol service, Kirking of the Council - that sort of thing - possibly where church and civic occasions overlap.
I am hoping for some moral support here. Forgive the long post.
After the death of my husband I am faced with a huge task.
He had several collections, one consisting of specialist items which are insured in total for £20k, though won’t make that amount at auction. Other collectibles have some value, whilst others are somewhat niche so they will need time and effort to disperse eg vintage radios, LPs, electronics, gadgets, academic dress, church items.
And junk.
And too many tools for DIY.
My family are kind but have not time to give much practical help, though are supportive with occasional meals and gardening help.
My fellow executors live miles away. My fellow beneficiaries live miles away. It falls to me, so at least it means I can work at my own pace.
At times I have bursts of energy, but most of the time I feel overwhelmed. The house is very full. I have a reasonable amount of living space, but nowhere really to gather and sort/ stack items.
Three pieces of advice from well-meaning friends have not helped me. One was “Just get an auction house to take it away and forget it till you get the cheque,” another was “Just get a skip.” A third was “Take it to a charity shop”. ( she has not been in our house).
These are my husband’s treasured possessions. He resisted all my pleas to start to disperse his collections whilst he could. “Get rid of them and you destroy my life,” he said.
Someone has said he can’t have cared for me much if he deliberately left me all this stuff to deal with. Ouch!
My immediate task, which may not be strictly necessary but I feel I need to do it to have a record, is to photograph groups of collectibles which will go for auction. It is a long task. Then to decide which auction house to go with. One has visited and offered a very decent rate of commission and will take everything I want to send, not just the special collection, another will fetch higher prices but costs are much higher, a third will make me an offer for the whole lot once I have provided photos and details of everything. I just can’t do that, there is too much, though I could maybe make a selection.
I am hoping for some moral support here. ...
These are my husband’s treasured possessions. He resisted all my pleas to start to disperse his collections whilst he could. “Get rid of them and you destroy my life,” he said.
Someone has said he can’t have cared for me much if he deliberately left me all this stuff to deal with. Ouch!
My immediate task, which may not be strictly necessary but I feel I need to do it to have a record, is to photograph groups of collectibles which will go for auction. It is a long task. Then to decide which auction house to go with. One has visited and offered a very decent rate of commission and will take everything I want to send, not just the special collection, another will fetch higher prices but costs are much higher, a third will make me an offer for the whole lot once I have provided photos and details of everything. I just can’t do that, there is too much, though I could maybe make a selection.
I'm sorry some bastard said that to you. It's totally untrue. People just can't face certain tasks, especially when they're at end of life. But you know that...
As regarding the immediate task, a) go easy on yourself. You too are gravely wounded right now, and shouldn't expect much of yourself for quite some time.
b) Could you perhaps make a deal with a local university student or similar to do the actual photographing and detailing, in return for a cut of the money it fetches you in the end? They've got the energy you don't have, and might appreciate the financial help.
Getting some help in is an excellent idea. One of your grandchildren might be able to help?
Maybe try and do a very small amount each day?
Thinking of you, it is a horrible task to have to do, but you don't have to do it all now.
If Mr P’s collecting connected him with any clubs maybe they might be able to help. If so you might be wise to get some kind of reference from anyone who offers help or is offered for help.
Thank you for the kind responses.
After writing earlier, I got stuck in to a good sorting out session, a drop in the ocean but all positive progress.
BroJames, yes, I have had some semi-professional help from two sources with the major collection, but there is still a lot for me to do.
Sarasa, my youngest and kindest grandchild is away at the moment but I hope he will help when he gets back. The older three are working on holiday jobs. The one who had offered to help with electronics hasn’t got a spare day for ages, as he is working, so I feel a bit let down there.
Lamb Chopped, good thought, if I can find someone. Grandson is the obvious one, but I can’t compete with Aldi’s rate of pay.
I must grit my teeth and get on with it this weekend. The family are all away.
I need my stepson to come and take things he wants, but he has yet to fix a date.
Next week a charity is coming to collect three items of furniture to restore and sell. They were made by Mr P’s grandfather who was a carpenter, but I shall be glad to move them on and help someone else in the process.
I'm inclined to agree with the auction house idea (my late father-in-law was an auctioneer, and I understand that what used to be "his" firm were very good at house clearances and knowing what was worth something and what wasn't).
If you have a local auctioneer, especially one that specialises in any kind of collectibles, get them in. They'll know what's what, what will sell and when an appropriate auction is being held somewhere (they might even offer advice about pick-up and transportation).
It might even be worth your while to google auctioneers who specialise in whatever Mr P's collectibles were - you may find there's one local enough to you.
If you can wait until your stepson has had a chance to look at the stuff, then do - he may well want some of the things that you'd otherwise have disposed of.
We recently spent ten days clearing out my beloved late mother-in-law's house. A friend arranged for a full size skip, which was embarrassing - surely we'd only take up a corner of it? Aye, right. After ten days it was overflowing and we were leaving bin bags with the neighbours. A strange (to me) phenomenon was that many things that had seemed sentimentally valuable seemed to die with her - somehow, they needed their owner to breathe life into them. Twenty or so boxes of books went for recycling - who needs a heavily annotated life of John Calvin? I hauled the once-valuable stereo equipment to a specialist dealer, only to get the kind of response you get from a vet about a dead pet, "Would you like us to dispose of it for you?" Various family members kept the paintings and a handful of books and some small things. I found and kept a sledge hammer (and a few other small things). The most fearsome item is still a suitcase full of photographs going back the better part of a hundred years. Dealing with them will take time and courage. A large box of papers going back much longer than that is positively smirking at us, but will probably reward study eventually. Her church owns the house and finishing the work is all theirs - they are taking the furniture that was left. On the last morning, we had breakfast, locked the door, threw the toaster into the skip and drove away.
We got home and I immediately started weeding my own books and papers.
I am going to be quite drastic, over time, as I know my children will not want most of the things I treasure. We needed three skips for my parents’ house and vowed not to create the same problem for the next generation.
My husband just passed, thankfully we moved two years ago so unloaded some things then. This past year he was giving his treasures away to friends who visited as well as our family. I am now ready to get rid of some of my family treasures. I have told my children if there is anything you want, take it now. I am going with an auction, Most of the things are family pieces from the 1800s, so I was looking for antique auction houses, and thankfully I found one. At the same time, I do not have the energy to think about it right now. I am giving myself six months before I do anything.
Graven Image, our sympathies on your husband's death. Giving the treasures away was a very thoughtful step. It saved you one of the hardest worries you'd be confronted with. It also gave your husband an opportunity to explain each gift to the beneficiary, whatever little quirks it had, its history, and why he was giving it to the beneficiary.
@Puzzler - I have been away, and only just saw your posts. I'm sorry for your loss. I know a fair bit about old electronics and radios, and DIY / industrial tools etc. If you'd like to discuss by PM I would (for instance) be happy to tell you what things are (where I know) if you are able to provide photos, and to suggest roughly what they might be worth / how easy or hard it might be to find a buyer. I am in Manchester, so probably nowhere physically near you, but perhaps I might be able to be useful in that way. The charity 'tools with a mission' might also be worth considering for some things, and in many areas they collect.
cheers
Mark
There's a Tool Library along the road from me (in an actual old library building as it happens), where you can borrow things that you don't want to buy - would there be anything like that near you?
If the stuff's in good nick (and it sounds like it probably is) they might be able to use some of it.
Piglet, I am not aware of a tool lending library near me, but Tools with a Mission has an address for donations not far away, so once we have done more sorting, some can go there. I just have no space to gather the different things separately, so until I know I am going somewhere or someone is coming to collect, they just have to stay where they are. My son is coming to help me tomorrow.
We bought a book for reading while traveling - a door stopper, page turner thriller. We both read it. The apartment in which we were staying on holiday had a book shelf, so I intended to leave it behind there.
Despite agreeing that neither of us would ever re-read this book (no point, once we knew the ending), the NE Man insisted we take it home and keep it.
That is the question I keep asking myself as I discover more and more oddities, items in threes, items purchased but unopened (not gifts), items bought as investments but will not make money, old and useless items not disposed of, unnecessary replacements bought, items a household only needs one of but he had to have his own supply…WHY?
I conclude he was a hoarder, not the piles- of-newspaper type hoarder, but fear of running out, wanting to be prepared, keeping just in case. That I can understand. Quirky collectibles, even. The rest- not.
Our "items purchased by unopened" are all hobby stuff for hobbies the NE Man does not have, because his working hours are too long to permit him to have hobbies. I think he buys them to try to make himself believe that he might one day have time. The one that annoys me most is a large wheelbarrow, the top-of-the-range most expensive one, which is too heavy and unwieldy for me to use. It takes up half of the shed, so we have a shed we can't use, because it's full of a wheelbarrow we don't use and, realistically, we were never going to use, and which I could have told him before he bought it, would never be used.
The chances of the wheelbarrow ever being used as a wheelbarrow are, IMO, about nil. I have no intention of ever using it, and the NE Man doesn't have the time.
It has been pressed into service to catch drips when the shed roof was leaking, but we could have used a bucket for that, or, at any rate we could have used a bucket were it not for the wheelbarrow taking up so much bloody space that there was no room for a bucket.
Before he bought it, I pointed out that it was too heavy and awkward for me, and I am the one that does all the gardening. And the NE Man said that he wanted to do some gardening, but was being thwarted by lack of tools. All he needed was a large, heavy wheelbarrow and he would be gardening away merrily.
Narrator's voice - he did not start gardening away merrily.
I recognise that situation entirely NEQ - you describe it so vividly your post had me laughing out loud! You are a loss to the world of radio script writing (presuming of course that's not what you do . . . )
Probably most of the unused “ spares” are because Mr P’s health limited what he could do latterly, to be fair - though not entirely.
Our shed is in perfect order! The only place that is! But full of things I shall never use. Today my daughter happily claimed some gardening tools surplus to my limited requirements. She is coming back on Thursday to do some gardening here, as she has green fingers and I don’t.
The wheelbarrow lives outside the shed. Good idea to turn it into a planter.
It would be a large and ugly planter. The main feature of the wheelbarrow was that it was the most expensive one, which the NE Man took as an indication that it was "the best".
It was the only criteria he could go on, knowing nothing about gardening.
I may have inflicted this on you before, and if so, I apologize. Mr. Lamb (like many refugees and former prisoners of war) has hoarder-like tendencies because he can't get rid of a deepseated sense that someday the whatever-it-is might make the difference between... he wouldn't say "life or death," but I'm pretty sure that's in the back of his mind somewhere. It's the same reason why the Holocaust survivor doctors my mother knew kept stuffing their pockets with salt and sugar packets in the cafeteria, despite making four times her salary.
Just last night again he came home with two handsful of groceries of a sort we will never eat, because someone pressed them on him and he could not say no. I will have to smuggle them out of the house (where we have no room to store them) and take them to my work, where leaving them on the free table will probably work nicely.
I am clearing out Mr. Image's stuff. He was a technical illustrator, starting back in the day when all drawings were done by hand sitting at a drafting table. I have a whole bunch of his work that I was about to chuck when a friend told me they are now rather valuable. Who knew? Guess I best look into this before I do any tossing.
Comments
I think that's entirely the right thing to do - a lot of my tools etc have come that way, and in time I expect they'll go the same way!
Our (industrial) museum is drowning in dead-men's-tools. I like tools, so for me this is a good thing!
@Huia , that's a nice thing to remember your Dad by. A steel one, or one of those boxwood things with brass hinges which folds 3 ways?
I know exactly what you mean - cool, aren't they!
(I should really get rid of the worst things from my rag box and move everything along a notch).
When Mr Puzzler is home from hospital and sufficiently strong enough I will be begging him to agree to get rid of some of his stuff. He can’t take it with him. Am hoping he can make a hobby of selling the specialist collectibles rather than leaving me with the task, when I know nothing about them.
Good idea!
I have started on the three boxes of paper nostalgia today. I’m hoping to whittle it down to one box. It’s do-able but I know it will take a long time.
Google tells me that E&M closed in 2007.
Perhaps I should have kept them as a reminder that a bargain is only a bargain if you are actually going to use the item.
I need to do a thorough going audit of the everyday wear.
I have fourteen of my late grandfather's pocket diaries spanning 1976-1989. My grandfather was not a Samuel Pepys; I have only dipped into his diaries, but everything is mundane - a late frost, a slow puncture, a haircut, a family birthday, a visit from a friend.
The main pleasure is in seeing his distinctive writing. I know no-one in the generation below me will be interested in them. Rather than have them just sitting there on a shelf, is there anything I could do with them?
On 3 March 1976, my grandfather dropped my grandmother off at her sisters, and went for a walk. On 3 March 1977, my grandparents had tea and sandwiches with my aunt, on 3 March 1978, it rained all day, so my grandfather stayed in, wrote a letter to his sister in Canada and watched TV, on 3 March 1979 my grandfather bought vegetables, watched Scotland play rugby on TV and had a phone call from his friend Alec, on 3 March 1980 there was an overnight frost, he checked the oil level in the car, and called in on a friend.
Also, if I were to pass them on to a project, I'd have to add notes as to who the people mentioned were, as they would mean even less to anyone who didn't know that Liz was my grandfather's sister, Charlie was his next door neighbour etc etc.
Or rather it was in sight. This morning a tin box of church stuff was decluttered out of the church vestry and into my study.
I have decided the only way to cope is to put Furniture and Stuff into storage. MrPuzzler thinks this is crazy, but needs must. There is a fair bit of decluttering to be done first.
I also plan to get new carpets for those rooms, hoping the carpet layer can fit in with my precise dates.
They'd almost certainly say NO, NO, a thousand times NO to any attempt to send them any private and personal papers, but church records would have great use in any historical study of your area.
After the death of my husband I am faced with a huge task.
He had several collections, one consisting of specialist items which are insured in total for £20k, though won’t make that amount at auction. Other collectibles have some value, whilst others are somewhat niche so they will need time and effort to disperse eg vintage radios, LPs, electronics, gadgets, academic dress, church items.
And junk.
And too many tools for DIY.
My family are kind but have not time to give much practical help, though are supportive with occasional meals and gardening help.
My fellow executors live miles away. My fellow beneficiaries live miles away. It falls to me, so at least it means I can work at my own pace.
At times I have bursts of energy, but most of the time I feel overwhelmed. The house is very full. I have a reasonable amount of living space, but nowhere really to gather and sort/ stack items.
Three pieces of advice from well-meaning friends have not helped me. One was “Just get an auction house to take it away and forget it till you get the cheque,” another was “Just get a skip.” A third was “Take it to a charity shop”. ( she has not been in our house).
These are my husband’s treasured possessions. He resisted all my pleas to start to disperse his collections whilst he could. “Get rid of them and you destroy my life,” he said.
Someone has said he can’t have cared for me much if he deliberately left me all this stuff to deal with. Ouch!
My immediate task, which may not be strictly necessary but I feel I need to do it to have a record, is to photograph groups of collectibles which will go for auction. It is a long task. Then to decide which auction house to go with. One has visited and offered a very decent rate of commission and will take everything I want to send, not just the special collection, another will fetch higher prices but costs are much higher, a third will make me an offer for the whole lot once I have provided photos and details of everything. I just can’t do that, there is too much, though I could maybe make a selection.
I'm sorry some bastard said that to you. It's totally untrue. People just can't face certain tasks, especially when they're at end of life. But you know that...
As regarding the immediate task, a) go easy on yourself. You too are gravely wounded right now, and shouldn't expect much of yourself for quite some time.
b) Could you perhaps make a deal with a local university student or similar to do the actual photographing and detailing, in return for a cut of the money it fetches you in the end? They've got the energy you don't have, and might appreciate the financial help.
Maybe try and do a very small amount each day?
Thinking of you, it is a horrible task to have to do, but you don't have to do it all now.
After writing earlier, I got stuck in to a good sorting out session, a drop in the ocean but all positive progress.
BroJames, yes, I have had some semi-professional help from two sources with the major collection, but there is still a lot for me to do.
Sarasa, my youngest and kindest grandchild is away at the moment but I hope he will help when he gets back. The older three are working on holiday jobs. The one who had offered to help with electronics hasn’t got a spare day for ages, as he is working, so I feel a bit let down there.
Lamb Chopped, good thought, if I can find someone. Grandson is the obvious one, but I can’t compete with Aldi’s rate of pay.
I must grit my teeth and get on with it this weekend. The family are all away.
I need my stepson to come and take things he wants, but he has yet to fix a date.
Next week a charity is coming to collect three items of furniture to restore and sell. They were made by Mr P’s grandfather who was a carpenter, but I shall be glad to move them on and help someone else in the process.
If you have a local auctioneer, especially one that specialises in any kind of collectibles, get them in. They'll know what's what, what will sell and when an appropriate auction is being held somewhere (they might even offer advice about pick-up and transportation).
It might even be worth your while to google auctioneers who specialise in whatever Mr P's collectibles were - you may find there's one local enough to you.
If you can wait until your stepson has had a chance to look at the stuff, then do - he may well want some of the things that you'd otherwise have disposed of.
Best of luck - I know it's not an easy task!
We got home and I immediately started weeding my own books and papers.
I am going to be quite drastic, over time, as I know my children will not want most of the things I treasure. We needed three skips for my parents’ house and vowed not to create the same problem for the next generation.
cheers
Mark
If the stuff's in good nick (and it sounds like it probably is) they might be able to use some of it.
Despite agreeing that neither of us would ever re-read this book (no point, once we knew the ending), the NE Man insisted we take it home and keep it.
Why? Why?? WHY???
I conclude he was a hoarder, not the piles- of-newspaper type hoarder, but fear of running out, wanting to be prepared, keeping just in case. That I can understand. Quirky collectibles, even. The rest- not.
The chances of the wheelbarrow ever being used as a wheelbarrow are, IMO, about nil. I have no intention of ever using it, and the NE Man doesn't have the time.
It has been pressed into service to catch drips when the shed roof was leaking, but we could have used a bucket for that, or, at any rate we could have used a bucket were it not for the wheelbarrow taking up so much bloody space that there was no room for a bucket.
Narrator's voice - he did not start gardening away merrily.
🙂🌸
Our shed is in perfect order! The only place that is! But full of things I shall never use. Today my daughter happily claimed some gardening tools surplus to my limited requirements. She is coming back on Thursday to do some gardening here, as she has green fingers and I don’t.
The wheelbarrow lives outside the shed. Good idea to turn it into a planter.
It was the only criteria he could go on, knowing nothing about gardening.
Just last night again he came home with two handsful of groceries of a sort we will never eat, because someone pressed them on him and he could not say no. I will have to smuggle them out of the house (where we have no room to store them) and take them to my work, where leaving them on the free table will probably work nicely.