Today I Consign To Hell -the All Saints version

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  • Thanks, all.

    Suggestions for pet name(s) welcome...
    :grimace:

    I don't know if this is a good idea. When I started using compression stockings for lymphoedema, a kindly nurse suggested I give them a pet name. I told her she wouldn't want to hear what I called them in private while wrestling with them, and that was the last that was ever said on the subject.
  • Re floaters: If ever anything unexpected happens to your eyes, remember that Eye Casualty are always open and will see you straight away. Even if you think,and it turns out to be correctly, that it is nothing important, remember Eye Casualty are there.
  • @SusanDoris - yes, I did think of Eye Casualty, but it seemed more sensible to book an appointment with a local optometrist as soon as possible. The nearest Eye Casualty hospital is a bit of a pig to get to...

    @Pendragon - I don't have sunglasses, but my ordinary specs are 'reactolite' (sp?), so they should help (said he, hopefully).

    I have a taxi booked, and my face-covering ready for action!

  • RossweisseRossweisse Hell Host, 8th Day Host, Glory
    I don't know if this is a good idea. When I started using compression stockings for lymphoedema, a kindly nurse suggested I give them a pet name. I told her she wouldn't want to hear what I called them in private while wrestling with them, and that was the last that was ever said on the subject.
    You’re able to get yours on yourself? Oooh!


  • Bishops FingerBishops Finger Shipmate
    edited July 2020
    I had to wear the dratted things (essential though they are) whilst in hospital, but was quite happy to leave them to the cheerful Staff Nurse* who was looking after me, and who was most concerned to make sure that they were correctly worn.
    :wink:

    *She's Bulgarian, but gained her nursing degree in Greece. Now working in England, she's able to speak fluently in several different languages, and to write in THREE different alphabets - Cyrillic, Greek, and Roman.

    So, TICTH the idiotic xenophobes 'ruling' this benighted country, and who wish to get rid of Horrid Foreign People Like Her (probably because she's far better educated and capable than they'll ever be...).

    Rant over.
    :grimace:
  • jedijudyjedijudy Heaven Host
    A public service announcement!
    Regarding compression stockings: when I had to wear them (for vein stripping...yuck) the doctor sold me my first pair. It hurt like crazy to put them on! Then I read the instructions! I don't know if you all have already done that and still have a hard time with them, but forgive me if I'm teaching you to suck eggs!

    Here's a video about what I learned on the information sheet that came with my first stockings:

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nNbmNuzIO98
  • I wish it were that easy! Not being a flexible young gymnast like the girl in the video doesn't help, but mine are essentially tights with one leg cut short. You need rubber gloves to grip them, and lot of patience to get them off at night. I don't want to imagine old age with this to deal with. That's probably more than anybody wants to read.
  • PriscillaPriscilla Shipmate
    Re compression stockings: I’ve been given something called a Steve. It’s basically a plastic half pipe over which you put the stocking. This holds it open enough for you to put your foot into the stocking and slide it up your leg, releasing Steve in the process.
    I probably haven’t described it very well, but I’m sure there’s something on Wikipedia or suchlike a bout it. It’s still a struggle, but at least you don’t have to be a gymnast to use it!
  • I think I've heard of this Useful Engine, though in my case I'd probably call it Radka, after the cheerful Staff Nurse I mentioned earlier!
  • HeavenlyannieHeavenlyannie Shipmate
    edited July 2020
    Yes, when I was a nurse we used a sort of frame to put them on.
  • Sounds like something that would be a nuisance to travel with, and would probably end up lost if I did. I think I'll stay with gloves and swearing.
  • After 15 years of suffering with lymphoedema (after effect of cellulitis) I have at last discovered some compression socks which are both effective and easy to put on, being very stretchy.
  • RossweisseRossweisse Hell Host, 8th Day Host, Glory
    I can't bend over (thanks to the original cancer having fiendishly metastasized into my bones), and I can barely move my left leg, so I require assistance in putting the damned things on. It is Most Annoying in every way.
  • Golden KeyGolden Key Shipmate, Glory
    {{{{{{{Rossweisse}}}}}}}
    {{{{{{{Shipmates and others using compression socks}}}}}}}
  • Today's eye check went OK - the floater (Mr Blobby) is nothing to worry about, and my eyes are otherwise fine.

    The whole process took over an hour, but I had to go and find something to do for 30 minutes whilst the drops worked, so I had an early lunch at the nearby Wimpy - how lovely to eat out in an almost-normal environment!

    Nothing to CTH today, although I was surprised to see one young person (a patient) NOT wearing a mask - she may, of course, be asthmatic or something, but the optometrist's establishment did seem a little unreal, with everyone else duly covered. The new normal, I suppose.
  • Nothing to CTH today,...
    There must be! Try harder!
  • O, all right then - TICTH the thought that our lovely FREE* National Elf Service here in England may be up for grabs (I hate that phrase) by Trump and his minions, if Johnson gets his wicked way, and his share of the spoils...

    (*not entirely, I know, but an advantage of getting Old is that one gets a great deal for free...)
  • An advantage of getting Old is that one gets a great deal for free...
    Also an advantage of living in Wales.

  • And, I believe, in Scotland, too.
  • Fawkes Cat wrote: »
    I was quite interested to find some of my immortal prose in a book a few years ago, from an article that I had (essentially) written for Wikipedia. As I understand it, putting anything on Wikipedia means that you have agreed to it being available for use by anyone for any purpose. But it was still a bit of a surprise.

    Wikipedia is licensed CC-BY-SA, meaning that it can be used freely, but such use requires attribution, and derivative works may not have a more restrictive license.

    Most of Wikipedia is also licensed under the GFDL, which also requires attribution.

    Either way, it's OK to copy your text from Wikipedia and re-use it for something, but either way, you should be credited.
  • AravisAravis Shipmate
    We do get free prescriptions in Wales - but we don’t have general health checks when we turn 50, as everyone does in England.
  • PigletPiglet All Saints Host, Circus Host
    edited July 2020
    I was delightedly surprised when I had to get a prescription shortly after moving back to Scotland, and when I proffered money, the pharmacist smiled and said, "no, it's free". When I left the UK 16 years ago, prescriptions cost about a fiver (IIRC).
  • Happily CingTH the community cat who, this very evening and in my greenhouse, danced across all the Freshly Potted Up lettuces.
  • O fie! Did any of the lettuces survive the Feline Dancing?
    :grimace:

    TICTH (though they may be there already) BT Broadband, which has been on the blink now for THREE DAYS. On and off (mostly off), and, although they admitted there was a problem yesterday, today they are telling Hideous Fibs, and saying that problems there are none!
    :grimace:
  • LydaLyda Shipmate
    Liar! Liar! Pants on fire! :angry:
  • PigletPiglet All Saints Host, Circus Host
    We had dodgy broadband for a while - whenever the land-line phone rang, the interweb signal would disappear from other devices like Tablets and laptops, and you'd have to turn them off and on again. S. hadn't really noticed it until lockdown, because she was usually at work when it happened, but when it happened when she was doing a work Zoom meeting, she Got A Bloke In, and it seems to be sorted now.
  • KarlLBKarlLB Shipmate
    Piglet wrote: »
    We had dodgy broadband for a while - whenever the land-line phone rang, the interweb signal would disappear from other devices like Tablets and laptops, and you'd have to turn them off and on again. S. hadn't really noticed it until lockdown, because she was usually at work when it happened, but when it happened when she was doing a work Zoom meeting, she Got A Bloke In, and it seems to be sorted now.

    Microfilter?
  • BT are today confessing to having problems in this area - and, in fact, over a wider area both north and south of the Thames estuary...

    I don't really want to have To Get A Bloke In, but I do wonder if my BT hub is reaching the end of its life. I have no idea what the life expectancy of such a Mysterious Magical Engine might be!
  • Ethne AlbaEthne Alba Shipmate
    edited July 2020
    On the matter of lettuces @Bishops Finger , three are no more.
    Two Might make it.
    Another five were repotted and at last glance were fine

    ☹️
  • Piglet wrote: »
    We had dodgy broadband for a while - whenever the land-line phone rang, the interweb signal would disappear from other devices like Tablets and laptops.
    We have this problem - up to a point. The signal disappears if we use the main downstairs phone. However things are fine if I use the upstairs extension (and, if the phone rings, pick it up before the answerphone downstairs kicks in). Most annoying, especially if we're watching iPlayer.

  • TonyKTonyK Shipmate, Host Emeritus
    Adding to the communications woes - TICTH my WIFI link which crashed twice while I was hosting the Benefice's Zoom service. Needless to say my ISP (who had better remain nameless for the time being!) are claiming that all is well in my neck of the woods - but they have suggested some possible domestic reasons why it may be happening with increasing frequency.
  • PuzzlerPuzzler Shipmate
    First Zoom crashed then our internet connection broke down during service time this morning. Maybe Satan is trying to sabotage all the simultaneous Zoom and YouTube services?
  • Ah! A Norful Warning not to rely on the Electric Interweb thingy for the future of our churches!
    :rage:

    Very annoying and frustrating, though, especially for those relying on online stuff from their church.

    I guess maybe the various systems are just rather overloaded at the moment.
  • PuzzlerPuzzler Shipmate
    Maybe it didn’t help that Mr Puzzler and I were visiting two different churches at the same appointed hour.
  • la vie en rougela vie en rouge Purgatory Host, Circus Host
    It's that time of year. Down with mosquitoes. They fly straight out of Satan's bottom.
  • Puzzler wrote: »
    Maybe it didn’t help that Mr Puzzler and I were visiting two different churches at the same appointed hour.

    Long live ecumenism!
  • It's that time of year. Down with mosquitoes. They fly straight out of Satan's bottom.

    Absolutely, every one of the bitey bastards.

  • PigletPiglet All Saints Host, Circus Host
    A small matter in The Grand Scheme Of Things, but TICTH the online job application form I was filling in this afternoon for the Scottish Qualifications Authority.

    The form itself was fine - everything filled in beautifully - but when I got to the Equal Opportunity page, the bit that asked for your marital status had only three options: Married, Single or "prefer not to say", none of which really applies. If they want to know, why can't they offer options for those of us who are widowed, separated, divorced, common-law or in a Civil Partnership?

    I tried leaving it blank, but it was having none of it, and wouldn't let me past the page. With any luck, the fact that I put "Mrs" as my title and mentioned in my supporting statement that I'm trying to rebuild my life after my husband's death will give them a hint ...
  • kingsfoldkingsfold Shipmate
    TICTH the "gentlemen," and I use that in it's very loosest definition, who were having a barney outside my flat at some ungodly hour this morning. I suspect alcohol may have been an initiator, but there was a great deal of effing and shouting. It didn't get much beyond "F*ck you" "F*ck off yourself", rinse and repeat, then something that sounded like a blow and someone else telling them to cool it (or similar).
    I wasn't sleeping well anyway, and was woken up by this one a couple of occasions. I did not need it.
  • PigletPiglet All Saints Host, Circus Host
    Crikey, Kingsfold - that sounds frightening. I hate witnessing any kind of fisticuffs - it scares the tripes out of me!
  • kingsfoldkingsfold Shipmate
    edited July 2020
    It was audio rather than visual... I had contemplated getting out of bed and leaning out the window to tell them to shut up, but at that point I heard what sounded like a blow. So I stayed exactly where I was and dived under the duvet! (the sounds moved off and I managed to get back to sleep for a bit)

    Last time I witnessed something/got involved, I was summoned to court four times, turned up in person three times and on the last time of asking the defendant pleaded guilty before we actually got into court so we were all sent home. Again. (But finally rather than you'll be back...)
  • I foiled* an attempted robbery at our local Co-Op back in 2004. Lots of interviews with the Police, an identity parade, and a summons to Court.

    Just the one trip to Court, as the defendant pleaded Guilty at the last minute, so at least I didn't have to stand up and be told that YOUR EVIDENCE IS NOTHING BUT A TISSUE OF LIES!! and all that stuff.

    The guy got 4 years in jail...
    :open_mouth:

    *The would-be robber pushed his way behind the till, assaulting the 8-months pregnant cashier whilst doing so. As he tried to leave, I bashed him over the head with a bottle of beer. In the fillums, he would have fallen over, but he didn't - so I bashed him over the head again, with a second bottle of beer. He still didn't fall over, but rushed off, soaked in beer and broken glass, and therefore easily identifiable. The idiot got into his car, and drove off past the shop, making it easy for the observant 10-year old nephew of another of the shop staff to take his number :lol: . The Police arrived very quickly - as the idiot drove past! - and so were in hot pursuit straightaway. The DS who interviewed me later had some difficulty in stifling his laughter, having seen the shop video of me valiantly bashing away with bottle after bottle. I suspect I was lucky not to have been charged with assault myself.

    I'm not a violent person, but...
    :grimace:
  • BroJamesBroJames Purgatory Host
    Well done to you BF. It would be very easy just to freeze and do nothing.
  • That's more-or-less what my Ma said when I told her...
    :smile:
  • Robert ArminRobert Armin Shipmate, Glory
    It's good to know that someone on Ship is able to repel boarders, if necessary.
  • Har, har! Shiver me timbers (or beer-bottles...)!
    :grimace:
  • DooneDoone Shipmate
    Well done, @Bishops Finger and splice the main brace (whatever that means 😆!).
  • It is 98 degrees F where I live right now, and I just received my first Christmas catalogue in the mail. This seems so wrong somehow
  • HuiaHuia Shipmate
    GI maybe it was a late mid-year "Christmas" - or they were giving you time to save up to buy their products.
  • A well-known C of E liturgist, in one of his books, suggested that clergy who might be rather 'busy' at Christmas would do well to think of celebrating the Incarnation privately at some point during August...
    :open_mouth:
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